Jeanne D'Arc Belzebuth

Back in those days when I would play NBA Jam Session, announcer Marv Alpert would bitingly scream, "BOOM SHAKALAKA," after a monster dunk. I always played with Shaq. Shaq's only weakness was his teammate, Scott Skiles. Skiles favorite position in NBA Jam was lying on his back because he was always getting dunked on.

As I write this, I'm drinking a French beer called Belzebuth. The French haven't done much right, but they got this beer right as far as high abv goes. The beating my liver is taking from this beer is akin to the ones NBA Jam Scott Skiles took. Belzebuth tastes like a standard Belgium ale, but it's dryer than dry. Like a puff of smoke, it literally dissapears on your tongue. This quality is disarming because it comes in at 12% a.b.v., but the mouthfeel is nowhere near what one would expect of such a high alcohal brew. The ass in the photo above must have been fooled by this and drank too much Bezelbuth. It tends to make you do things like lick beer bottles while making your eyes look insane.

Clipper City's Heavy Seas "Hang Ten"

Another beer in the 'Heavy Seas' series from Clipper City in Syphilis City, Maryland, is Hang Ten. It's a Weizen Dopplebock and it means my friend the pirate is back. I'm not positive but I think a Weizen Dopplebock is a Double Bock brewed with a portion of wheat in lieu of being an all barley malt ale. This beer is paying tribute to the style made famous by Aventis of Germany.

Hang Ten has a sharply acidic yeast nose with hints of sour lemon. It's coloration is browish red and puts heads to bed with it's 10% a.b.v. One can't tell there is so much alcohol in this beer from taste alone. The body is fairly thin where it should be heartier, ala Loose Cannon. The flavor has a yeasty tang tempered by a hefty malt flavor with hints of fig. A good beer, it pays tribute to Aventis fairly well, but if you want the perfect representation of this style I would recommend Aventis.

Apparently Clipper City is trying to drive me crazy with it's Heavy Seas labels. They have a penchant for pairing good beers with ridiculous labels. The pirate in the Seinfeld shirt from 'Loose Cannon' is back. Once again: he is oblivious to the danger he is in, the bird refuses to fly and I'm left wishing something in the picture would just kill them both already. If the shark would just bite off the pirate's hand, maybe he would stop drawing these labels. Beers of this high caliber demand better labels. This is probably the same pirate who walked into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch and when the bartender asked him how the steering wheel got there said, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts."

Bell's Two Hearted Ale

Two Hearted Ale is a fantastic IPA from Bell's brewery in Kalamazoo, Michigan. This brew starts with a citrus hop aroma close to grapefruit but also lemony. It's really hoppy and the aroma is sharp and powerful. The hop aroma carries over into the flavor. There is a firm malt body, adding a balancing force to the strength of the hops. The label is great as well. For whatever reason, most beers don't have labels that are so suggestive of a way of life. It would be funny if Natty Light did. Picture a Natty label with a college guy standing in a kiddie pool. He is under a waterfall of beer that sloshes around his calves and has a huge grin that implies he would rather be nowhere else. That would be a nice label.

Boston Beer Tour

I was in Boston last weekend and, as is my wont, went out and got some good beers. Mostly, I hit up oldies but goodies I can't get my hands on in the Siberian winter of beer that Florida is. I didn't really get to try any new beers because I found so many that I knew were money. I like to do a little quality control just to check and make sure my favorite ladies haven't changed.

I went for Bear Republic's Racer 5 IPA first. This is probably the best IPA I've ever had. It's perfect and I wouldn't change a thing about it. It has a spot-on balance of malt and hops and neither one gets out of line. The aroma varies between citrus and pine. It has a long silky body that highlights both the malt and the hops. This beer is liquid luxury.


Avery 'Twelve' Saison Ale is Avery's twelveth anniversary beer. A Saison is a spiced Belguin farm ale brewed to toast the spring. This version is the most appetizing form of Saison that I've encountered. It has a spicey, soapy cinnamon aroma and I mean this in the best way. It tastes like spiced cake and smells like a cosmetic product. I would bathe myself in it if that were acceptable. This beer is amazing for it's uniqueness. It is very rare (and possibly out of production) so I would recommend grabbing it if you see it in the store.



Next, I was on to Middle Ages BrewCo's Druid Fluid out of Syracuse, NY (I think). The Druids were some sort of midget people from England similar to present day Gypsies. This beer is a barley wine. It has smooth and thin body that isn't as thick and robust as most barley wines. This suits it because it's easier to cram more of it into your stomach. It's high in alcohol too. I drank a bottle at a family party and considered myself lucky that my pants were still on when I finished. My point isn't to mention that my family takes off their pants at parties but rather that it is high in alcohol. Unfortunately I didn't take notes and I was a little drunk when I drank it, so I don't have anything important to say about the flavor, etc. I will say that this is a great beer. The brewery makes a whole line of beers that are all good, well-made, tasty ales.

Pictured here is a picture that's very small. Dogfish Head's Raison d'Extra is pictured small for your own protection. This is the portion size I would recommended trying of this beer, that is to say small. It's somewhere around 15%. D'extra is a jacked up version of Raison D'etre, similar to Barry Bond's head circa 2006 vs. his head circa 1989: Big and Bulbous. This ale is brewed with a boatload of raisins. It's sort of like a Port in a.b.v. and flavor/aroma. It has a big aroma and flavor with notes of prunes and, obviously, raisins. Unlike my counterpart, I shared this Dizzy Fizzle beer with four people. My portion was 3 or 4 ounces. Even with such a small glass, I still felt it like a shot of whiskey. I even had to slow myself down on three ounces, but that was because it was lunch time. In my opinion, this is Dogfish Head's best attempt at a high alcohol beer as far as flavor is concerned. The World Wide Stout has more complexity, but you can find yourself wondering why they brewed it and, worse, wondering why you are drinking it. Raison D'Extra on the other hand, has a good flavor and is pleasing to drink if you like big, dank, pruney flavors like certain Ports.

Avery Hog Heaven

Hog Heaven is Avery's Barley Wine offering. It has 9.2% a.b.v. and a healthy dose of hops at 100 IBUs. It comes with a hoppy aroma but you also can the smell the considerable amount of malt in it. The first thing that jumped out at me was the bitterness. It comes very close to having too much bitterness. However, this beer has complexity and depth. The malt flavor combines with the bitterness to provide a slight chocolate flavor. There is also an orange citrus flavor. All these flavors kind of meld together in a strange dance and you don't really know what flavors will jump out next. On top of that, it attains an oaky flavor as it warms up (good beer often tastes better as it warms above refrigerator temperature as cold liquid paralyzes the taste buds). This beer is quite heavy as well. It has a thick, almost solid aspect to it, and a brown red color to match. It's a full flavored ale, and not for the faint of heart.

Boomshakalaka

I'm drinking Dogfish Head's World Wide Stout as I write....and I can barely concentrate on typing. I wouldn't say that the World Wide Stout has completely blown my mind, but I almost don't know what to say about it. The beer is black as night. There is barely any head, but what head there is looks like caramel.

Dfizzle suggests that you drink it for dessert, but I'm enjoying it as an appetizer. It boasts 18% abv, and just several sips in I can tell that I will feel it later but you can't taste the alcohol. The aroma is strong and the flavors are extremely deep and complex. Crazy barley action going on here. I can taste coffee flavor...and I LIKE IT.

This beer is consistently rated highly, and now I know why. If you have the opportunity to try this beer, take advantage.

The Orlando Brewing Company is Windy

Recently I hung out at the Orlando Brewing Company with a friend (no, it wasn't Mikey Mouse). It's located in an industrial part of O-town (where I think they manufacture Disney toys and Lou Pearlman may have buried the Backstreet Boys). I almost drove right past it but once I found it I was as happy as a raggedy man discovering an oasis in the desert . The brewery and pub are in a converted warehouse which is outfitted with brewing equipment and a bar. The warehouse factor made it look more like a loading dock than a bar but I thought that was one of the cool things about it and made it unlike other bars. They brew several of their own beers, most of which are USDA Certified Organic. There are also another ten or so great beers from other breweries on tap. Their beers are not exceptional but they are good. My favorite was their "Doble" I.P.A. It was 8% and came in a wine glass (I've never done drank beer that way). It had a nice light hoppiness with a firm malt backbone. They also had Houblon Chouffee Double I.P.A. Tripel on one of the guest taps, which is rare around these parts. Their selection was great, and even more impressive considering that Florida is a bit of a beer Siberia with almost all of the bars acting as Beer Gulags. I am reminded of a professor at college who would scream at tardy students, "To the Gulags with you." When you walk into bars around here, the taps scream, "No good beer for you." The professor would also invite students to come to his office for Sherry but despite my best efforts, I was never offered any.

Fun story: Someone walked in and sat down next to my friend. They began talking and we got into a big discussion about food. I mentioned how much I respected Chefs because they have to juggle upwards of twenty meals at once without ruining any. In reply, he mentioned he was an architect and that being an architect was much the same because he had to balance the interests of the client and the builder without compromising the interests of either one. Not quite my point, but this tends to happen a lot in Florida. I've found the best way to combat this is to not listen to what people are saying and immediately start talking about myself when they are done talking. I swear there is something in the water here. When this strange man left, my friend turned to me and whispered, "That man had a wandering eye."

From the way I started smelling, I am led to believe that they skimp on the AC at the Orlando Brewing Company. It's quite possible they add Curry when they brew their beers. Going along with the organic theme, I guess they are trying to be a greener brewery by conserving their AC use. I'm not sure if they own a wind machine or what, but the Orlando Brewing Company is one windy place (see picture). As you can also tell from the picture, the beers of the of Orlando Brew Co. seem to make your teeth whiter. If you find yourself stuck in Land of the Mouse and feel the need to escape to a real place for a beer, then the Orlando Brew Co. is the place I would recommend. Just watch out for the Disney traffic on the way back to Tampa.

Not So Metallic Steel Rail

Berkshire Brewing Company's Steel Rail Extra Pale Ale was a pleasant surprise. I attended a wedding in the Berkshires this past weekend (Congrats Byron and Steph) and desperately needed a drink after a long drive from D.C. I downed a couple of Jim & Gingers first; it was a wedding after-all. Then I saw an unfamiliar name at the bar and asked the friendly bar keep about Steel Rail. He said that if I liked a malty beer with some hops then I would probably like the local beer brewed right down the road. I said, "feed me." Well, he was right, I did like it. A lot. It's no great beer, but it's good. So refreshing. I should mention that I had it on draft. The beer was indeed malty, but I did not find it as hoppy as I was told. Boy did it go down easy. Unfortunately, the wedding bar did not have any other Berkshire Brewing beers available for my consumption, but you better believe that I checked out their website as soon as I got home (sadly, no time to find/visit the brewery). Berkshire Brewing's website identifies the Steel Rail E.P.A. as its "flagship product that has a full malt flavor and is balanced with a pronounced hop flavor and bitterness." Pretty sweet label too. I like trains.

Good Beer in a Can - Oskar Blues Gordon

Proof that good beer can come in a can is provided by Oskar Blues Brewery in Lyon, Colorado. They make three beers and all of them come in a can. Gordon is their most extreme beer. It's 8.7% abv and hopped to the gills. The strange thing about this beer is that it has such a big flavor but it's body doesn't pack a heavy punch the way the Maharaja does. The body is smooth as Barry White wearing a velvet shirt. The aroma is piney with notes of carmel and is aptly described as 'sticky' on the can. Gordon has an amber coloration and its flavor is quite structured. It tastes like there is something green in the beer, it's as if you are drinking a vegetable. There are occasional hints of chocolate and a general nutty flavor from the malts. And then there's the long, drawn out fresh hop flavor intermingling with the malt throughout the entire sip.

At between $3 and $4 per can Gordon is pricey, but I like to drink beer and throw money away so I figured why not kill two birds with one stone. Despite the price, this beer is well worth it. If you like big, bold, hoppy beers then trying Gordon's IPA is a must because the aren't any beers like this out there.

Clipper City's Heavy Seas Loose Cannon Hop3 Ale

The Clipper City Brewery of Baltimore, Maryland offers several brands of beer, most of which aren't very good. The lone exception is their Heavy Seas series that features high alcohol, robust beers. Loose Cannon is the shining star of the series. It is called a HOP3 (cubed) Ale because it is hopped three different ways - in the kettle, on it's way out of the kettle, and during fermentation. Anyway, HOP3 is just a fancy way of saying it's an I.P.A.

Of greatest concern to me is the label. It features a pirate looking the wrong while his cannon fires and knocks a bird overboard. Just in case the viewer has cognitive problems understanding pictorial scenes, the artist was gracious enough to add dialogue saying, 'Bird Overboard.' What never ceases to amaze me is why the bird is so resigned to it's fate? It can fly, why does it look so suprised? A better label might depict the cannon accidentally backfiring and blowing up both the pirate and the bird. It's Natural Selection: If the pirate can't see and the bird can't fly then they both should die.

The label is the only detail about this beer that I do not appreciate. Loose Cannon is an excellent beer with a strong hop aroma that is fruity without being specific, possibly suggesting fresh grapes. At 7.25% it has a healthy amount of alcohol but you would never know it from the brew's body. The body is quite thin and smooth, making Loose Cannon a beer you can drink and drink more of without feeling like you need to make more room for beer by burping. On the palate, this ale provides an excellent balance between crisp maltiness and hop flavor while finishing dryly with a slight bitterness. This beer is a great choice, don't be fooled by the label like I was - it gives you something to bristle at while you drink your beer.

This Beer Will Slay You

The Avery Brewing Company brews a wide range of excellent beers. I have tried most of their offerings and only disliked one of them (The White Racal). All the others were excellent and the Avery Maharaja might be one of their best. It is one largest IPAs out there and comes in around 9.6% alcohol by volume with over 100 IBUs (International Bitterness Units). Basically, it has a lot of hops and tons of malt that marry perfectly in your mouth. It has a grapefruity nose and a piney flavor. It is the definition of a resiny beer and tastes like Montana would if you could put it in a bottle. What makes this beer unique is it's thick malt character that can be described as chewy. Due to the malt, it comes equipped with a firm, thick body and full mouth feel.

Judging by the sword and the crazy look in his eye, this man will slay you for making fun of his hat.

Bell's Oberon

Hi, I'm Brendan. Kenneth will be making his first posting soon and I'll let him introduce himself. For now, you just get me. We haven't really made any formal decisions about how this will work, I think it will just sort of work itself out. I came up with the idea for a beer blog while I was wasting away behind my desk. I'm excited because it gives me another excuse to drink. So here we go with the first posting...

Bell's Oberon. From Kalamazoo, Michigan. It's their summer ale. Their line, "[a]n American wheat ale with the color and scent of a summer afternoon."

I found this beer to be very refreshing. It goes down super smooth. Its a little citrusy and has a great aroma. I love the orange and blue bottle. The beer is a bit cloudy with a pale gold color.

OK thats enough for now. What I wrote sounds really cheesy. I'm just going to end it with that.